by Wanda Chiu
Death is a reality no one can deny and it can happen at any time. However, if someone talks about death many people refuse to listen as if death did not exist. But it is a reality we need to face, a reality that we need to be prepared for. And before death becomes a reality, what comes first is the fear of death. Fear of death is the ultimate source of all human fears or the sum of all fears. Physical death is dreadful and paralyzing. It means total annihilation of all that we know - a total detachment from the human world and all material comforts exclusive to life. People are afraid to die maybe because of the uncertainties of the life to come. Buddhists believe in reincarnation, and they are uncertain whether they will be reincarnated as human beings or as an inferior form of life. Christians are also uncertain of their destiny, not knowing whether they will go to a heaven and a full life or to a hell with a complete annihilation of the soul. Death is perceived as the meeting point between life and the life to come, and an entrance to a life of eternity. Types of Death Fears Fear of death can be broken down into a few more specific fears: Fear of pain and suffering - many people fear that they will meet death with excruciating pain and suffering. This fear is common in many healthy people and is often seen in patients dying of cancer or other painful diseases. Fear of the unknown - death is the ultimate unknown. No one has survived it to tell us what happens afterward. It’s in our human nature to want to understand and make sense of the world around us but death can never be fully understood while we are still alive. Fear of non-existence - many people fear that they will cease to exist after death. This fear isn’t confined only to atheists. Many religious people also worry that their belief in an afterlife isn’t true after all. Fear of external punishment – this belief isn’t only for the most devout. People from every religion as well as many with no religion at all fear that they will be punished for what they did, or did not do, here on earth. Fear of loss of control – our human nature seeks control over situations. Death is something that is out of our control and that is very scary. Some people will attempt to hold some control over death with extremely careful behavior and rigorous health checks. Fear of what will become of our loved ones – probably the most common fear of death among new parents, single parents, and caregivers is the fear of what will happen to those entrusted to our care if we should die. Fear of death can be so severe that it interferes with our daily life. It can consume one’s thoughts and affect the decisions we make. This is an unhealthy fear and should be addressed by a trained mental-health professional. But it’s possible that the fear of death can be healthy as well. When we fear dying, we are more careful and take appropriate precautions like wearing seat belts and bike helmets. A healthy fear of death also reminds us to make good use of our time while we are still alive, and not to take any encounters or relationships for granted. It pushes us to work hard to leave a lasting legacy and to stay up-to-date with those we love. As someone once said, “I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work the more I live.” The closer you get to love, the less room there is for fear. a
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May 2024
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