by Joanna Liu Imagine you’re standing in front of the cinema, thinking about which movie you should see that night. Will you choose an exciting Hollywood movie full of computer graphic effects, explosions, and superstars, or a seemingly dull documentary film that only tells of small potatoes? I believe most people would choose the former. However, more and more people are starting to notice documentary films. Even if you’re not a big fan of documentaries, you must have heard of “Jump Boys”, “Let It Be,”; and “My Football Summer.” Right now, there seems to be a documentary wave in Taiwan: are you curious about this alternative that is so different from Hollywood movies? Normally, the first time you meet someone they will ask you what your name is and where you are from. The second of these questions, however, is not always easy to answer. Americans who appear white, Peruvians who seem Hispanic, or black Africans might look like where they came from, but what about American born Chinese, Australian born Koreans, or Canadian born Japanese? The sad truth is that people will never know these things unless they are willing to start a real conversation with you. For me, it’s been a real struggle when people ask me where I am from. I wonder: I’m from Taiwan? I’m from America? My answer will differ depending on whom I’m speaking with. I either say, “I’m from Taiwan” or “I’m from Taiwan but I lived in America.” And if I’m in America, I say, “I lived in Taiwan.”
There are many reasons for these different answers: 1. I don’t want to offend anyone · If I say I’m American to a Taiwanese person, they’ll think I’m being ridiculous because I look Asian and I currently live in Taiwan. · If I say I’m American in America then people won’t think I’m American enough because I’m considered too “conservative.” I was forced by my parents not to become too Americanized. I had to go home right after school; I couldn’t go to too many parties. · If I just say that I’m Taiwanese I feel uncomfortable because I just don’t belong. Apparently I’m too Americanized for many people in Taiwan. They think people who speak English well are snobby, which is totally untrue. They choose to be ignorant and don’t take the time to understand. Just because I have an Asian face doesn’t mean that I have to act in certain ways. 2. I don’t want people to think less of me · If you tell Taiwanese people that you aren’t Taiwanese they’ll discriminate against you. I’ve never tried this because I know it won’t turn out well. People are proud – sometimes too proud – of their own country. 3. Some people just can’t understand · People who choose not to understand will never understand. Up until now, I still can’t give a definitive answer because every answer will leave me unsatisfied. I’m from Taiwan, yes that is correct but also incorrect. My parents are Taiwanese, so my blood is “Taiwanese.” The truth is that I don’t feel or think like a Taiwanese at all. It’s just not the way I was raised. Another problem is that my Chinese skills are not very polished so people will condemn me for that. I’m from America, yes that is also correct and incorrect. For twelve years of my life I lived there. There’s a lot to love, but also lots of room for improvement. I know more about the culture, I feel more accepted, and I feel more at home. I can be myself. People would tell me, “just be yourself,” you can be whatever you want to be. But my personality didn’t seem to fit my environment and I was in total self-conflict for at least a year. My breaking points were so strange that they couldn’t be explained. I couldn’t focus on positive things because all I could see were the negative ones. A few weeks ago, my boyfriend and I were arguing over our different ideals. He asked me, “Are you Taiwanese or American?” That was the first time I was forced to think of the question seriously and I said, “I’m American!” This was not a happy conversation. After thinking about it even more, I realized that I have the best of both worlds but I don’t belong in either place. So I decided to do some research on how East Asians think differently, and I decided that Westerners tend to think more analytically, while people in Asia are more holistic. Analytic thinking is a cognitive style characterized by logical reasoning, a narrow focus on conspicuous objects in the foreground, and a belief that events are the product of individuals and their attributes. Holistic thinking is characterized by dialectical reasoning and focuses on background elements and a belief that events are the products of external forces and situations. These two ways of thinking are really quite different, but it is important that neither is superior to the other—they’re just different. Nor does everyone in a particular cultural group think the same way. In North America and Western Europe, for example, many people promote an independent social orientation that values autonomy, self-expression, and individual achievement. Many in East Asia and Latin America, however, promote an interdependent social orientation that values harmony, relatedness, and success of the in-group. But can Westerners think like East Asians? Yes. And East Asians can think like Westerners, too. In fact, most of us have the capacity to think analytically or holistically, depending on our state of mind. So what is our identity? It’s all about perspective. #horizontal a
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May 2024
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