By Winnie Lin “I’m leaving on a jet plane. Don’t know when I’ll be back again.” This is a sad moment. You have to part from your dear one because you have to go to another city for work or study. You can’t see each other for a few weeks–possibly several months. You don’t know where this long distance relationship will go, and you’re not sure whether it will work or not. For people in a long distance relationship, there are problems and difficulties such as communication and loneliness, and it’s really not easy to deal with. However, with some advice along with a little effort, I’m sure you can survive a long distance relationship. In a long distance relationship, you can’t see each other very often; that’s why communication becomes so important. In the past, people only had two choices: spend a huge amount of money calling by phone, or wait for letters that take weeks to receive. Now with modern technology everything has become much easier. You can send emails with just a click or write down your ideas on a secret BBS board set up just for the two of you. You can chat on MSN or see each other through a webcam. Kelly, an exchange student in Holland, said she and her boyfriend in Taiwan often go about their daily business with their webcams on; it’s as if they were still around each other. If your partner is not at home and you have something to say to him or her, just leave messages on MSN. If you want to hear each other’s voice, use Skype; this free VoIP system allows you to make free phone calls online, and you don’t have to worry about phone bills afterwards. Use these communication channels well and keep each other informed about the events in your life. That’s the way to keep your relationship alive.
Another problem that couples in a long distance relationship have to overcome is loneliness. You used to hang around with each other but now you are apart, so of course you feel lonely. However, are you going to cry and drown yourself in tears because you miss your honey so much? My suggestion is to stop crying and get a life! Keep yourself busy or start a new hobby. Now you have time to stay in the library, you can work harder on your studies, get really good grades and share the news with your honey. You can also take on a new hobby such as cooking or sport and discuss it with your partner. Mina, a student who has gone to Australia, often spends half her day buying ingredients and cooking. She said that this can keep her from thinking about her boyfriend in Taiwan all the time. She often tells her boyfriend what she cooked that day and what she’ll cook for him when she comes back. Also, you should spend some time planning to meet each other. The anticipation of seeing each other will give you hope and excitement and will relieve the loneliness during the process. Sometimes you can even give your partner surprises, such as sending unexpected cards, flowers, chocolate, or presents. These romantic acts will definitely ease your partner’s loneliness and spice up your relationship. Trust is also a major issue couples in a long distance relationship have to face.First, you have to believe that the relationship will work and have faith in it. If you think your relationship will end sooner or later anyway, you’ll be influenced by bad comments and be attracted by temptations easily. Mutual trust is also crucial to the relationship. You both have to be honest since you can’t see each other. Once you tell a lie, the trust between you will be broken. Don’t be suspicious because it will make your partner feel stressed; tension will grow between the two of you. Alice, who is doing an MA in Boston, said her boyfriend often gets mad when she goes clubbing with her classmates; she just wanted to go dancing and drinking with her friends, but she has to reassure him again and again that nothing will happen. She often gets impatient and they sometimes have fights about it. Suspicions are really harmful to long distance relationships. Last but not least, never cheat on your partner. You’re absolutely wrong if you think you can get away from it, and the consequences will be far more serious than you think. Long distance is hard but not impossible. If both of you really want to maintain your relationship you can handle problems like communication, loneliness, and trust. “So kiss me and smile for me, tell me that you’ll wait for me.” Give your dear a passionate farewell, promise you’ll always have each other in mind, make sure you’re ready to begin without fear or doubt! a
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May 2024
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